My 3 p.m. class lets out around 4:15 in the afternoon, and all that I can think about for that hour and 15 minutes is the chicken breast dinner with a side of rice and questionable broccoli waiting for me in McElroy. I power walk from Gasson to Carney's, my stomach leaping with anticipation as I climb the stairs. The tent is in view, and I round that corner like a planet in orbit … only to find the entrance cordoned off. I cannot wait, though. My adrenaline kicks in, my mind races: I could run to the Chocolate Bar and get an Oreo milkshake, but then I would have to remain stationary for at least two hours to avoid immediate sickness; maybe I should try the vending machine downstairs, but I do not feel like being told to "try again." Dejected, I crawl back to my room, positive that my stomach is processing my other internal organs for protein. However, I make one last-ditch attempt at sustenance, wrapping my cold fingers around the refrigerator handle. Luckily, in my panic, I had forgotten the cold Italian sub that I had purchased last week for such an emergency.
Sometimes I like to think that I am a wilderness survivalist even when I am 6 miles west of Boston. But, if you really want to get the flavor without ever leaving your room, I suggest you watch a little program called Survivorman. Allow Les Stroud, a mild-mannered Canadian man, to teach you what a real camping trip is all about, as he is dropped in extreme climates and locations for seven days. You may be wondering why Survivorman is so cool when it is matched against the much flashier (and hotel-pampered) Bear Grylls and his show Man vs. Wild. Well, it is probably because Les Stroud is dropped in these situations alone, and then he films himself. While Bear Grylls is sharing his feelings with a cameraman, Stroud is furiously setting up cameras and fashioning huts using palm fronds and birch saplings. In essence, Survivorman is the ultimate reality show - one in which reality is filmed and lessons are taught.
If you are swayed by my arguments and don't mind the sight of a semi-nude man providing instruction, get into the Survival Zone on discovery.com, where you can see video clips from the show and see TV schedules.
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