Pie-a-palooza in Power Gym

Call it a Clash of the Boston College Titans.

Or the Power Gym Pie-a-Palooza.

There are plenty of big sporting events happening all over BC this year. Florida State was certainly big. Duke may be even bigger on Feb. 1. And the Beanpot is always big.

But it doesn't get much bigger than Tuesday night's display during the volleyball team's match-up with Maryland.

For those of you very confused right now, you obviously deleted the latest BC sports marketing e-mail, assuming it was reminding you yet again to get to football games on time - shame on you.

Instead of another reminder, the e-mail set up an eating battle between the giants - literally - of BC athletics: Football behemoth Mathias Kiwanuka, hockey hitter Brian Boyle, basketball bruiser Craig Smith, and women's basketball skyscraper Kathrin Ress.

All told, they were throwing around some size, weighing in at an average of 6 feet-6 inches and 248 lbs.

But this wasn't a test of speed, size, or even skill. It was all about appetite.

The rules were simple enough. Eat as much of a Boston cream pie as you can, with your hands tied behind your back, in two minutes. The hungriest Eagle would win an iPod Nano for one lucky Superfan - but more importantly, bragging rights.

And the contestants weren't taking this as some pointless competition. This was about pride as much as anything.

"I talked to [Boyle] in the locker room earlier and he's mentally focused," said teammate Joe Pearce. "Now it's just gonna come down to the physical part."

"[Kathrin] didn't eat a lot at dinner last night and didn't get dessert," women's basketball head coach Cathy Inglese said. "I guess she was preparing."

Now that's dedication. And if you've ever watched those hot dog eating competitions, you know it's the 140 lb. guys, not the 300-pounders, that wins. It's not just about size, it's all strategy.

"I'm gonna throw my face in as far as I can and hope I don't suffocate." Kiwi said as he eyed the pies just like he would an opposing quarterback. "It's been a long time since I've eaten a pie, but I'm hungry."

"I bring my A-game every time - I'm pretty confident," Smith said as he mentally prepared himself for the feast that lay ahead.

"The trainer told me not to drink water," Ress said, a little leery of the fact that she was competing against "some pretty big guys."

And teammates and coaches were more than happy to give tips and support their guys.

"It's just like football, you gotta keep your motor running - except it's your mouth, not your feet," Kiwi's fellow defensive end Nick Larkin said. "I've seen him eat before and he's a big-time eater."

"Remember to breathe," Inglese reminded Ress.

When the feeding frenzy began, each pie-eater showcased their individual feasting styles. Ress appeared to go at her pie the most analytically, making a conscious choice with every bite. Kiwi was also methodical, settling into an "eat, chew, breathe, repeat" pattern. Boyle was a mess, barreling his noggin right into the pie with little concern to how much whipped cream he got on his face - even looking sick at several points. And like Boyle seated to his right, Smith went full-faced into the pie, pummeling it as he got into a chewing rhythm.

Everyone in attendance, from teammates to Superfans, stood to watch the excitement. It was clear early on that the slow and steady styles of Ress and Kiwi were going to leave too much pie on the table.

As the final buzzer sounded after two minutes of non-stop chomping, it appeared to be a dead heat between Smith and Boyle. Ultimately, pie official Danny Zepp - the event's organizer along with Sandra Tang - saw more of the silver pan in Smith's pie, raising his hand as champion, causing boos to rain down from Boyle's teammates.

"I was in a groove, and I had to get it done," Smith said wiping chocolate cream from his face.

Craig Smith. All-Big East first team. Leading scorer for Team USA in the World University Games. And now, most distinguished of all, BC pie-eating king.

"I cheated a little and spit some out on the table because I was going to throw up," Boyle said.

"I dove in too quick and bit off more than I could chew at first," a dejected Kiwi said. "I'm a bit disappointed in my performance."

In the end, all were left with a full stomach and a cream-covered face. Jamal Halepota, A&S '08, even walked out with the iPod thanks to Smith.

So it's back to the field, court, and rink for our culinary champions - until next time.

Hot dogs anyone?