College Connections: Prim and proper advice in our modern, collegiate setting

Recently, a biography of Emily Post was published, bringing the late queen of etiquette back into the spotlight. Post - who is generally considered to be the most influential woman in America after first lady Eleanor Roosevelt - first published her guide, Etiquette, in 1922 and almost instantly became the go-to expert on all things manners-orientated. Her influence is still seen today. You may not know her by name, but chances are she is the reason you got stuck writing that seemingly infinite amount of thank you notes after your high school graduation party.

But the college campus is a society all its own. And while more recent editions of Etiquette offer sections on roommates, it is unlikely that these books can adequately capture the nuances of college life. College is, after all, the only place - hopefully - where politically incorrect themed parties such as "Golf Pros/Tennis Hoes," or "CEO's/Office Hoes," or basically "men empowered/women objectified," are considered socially acceptable. The university setting poses a unique set of challenges that Post probably never had to face. (Most likely, Post was never sexiled. Then again, her marriage ended because her husband had an affair, so maybe she was.)

Thus, a new set of rules for etiquette needs to be written, one specifically tailored to the eccentricities and awkward encounters that comprise the college experience. While I'm no expert on how to behave in polite society, I have managed to make it through the past three years with only a minimal amount of embarrassment. With this in mind, I have compiled a brief guide for dealing with some of the situations that we college students occasionally find ourselves in.

When to update your relationship status on Facebook:

A delicate balance must be struck between being sensitive to the privacy and commitment issues of your new special friend and being sensitive to the people who obsessively check newsfeed. You have a social obligation, after all, to provide these people with something to read at 2 a.m. other than their notes.

That being said, no one really wants or expects you to provide a minute-by-minute account of your love life; what it says on your Facebook account should be the last thing on your mind when trying to figure out where you stand in a potential relationship.

Refrain from listing your status as "It's complicated"; this crosses the line between information we want to know and information we would rather not know.

Having class with a hook-up partner that ended badly:

There is nothing like the cold light of a Monday morning class to illuminate the lapse in judgment of a Saturday night. It is always best in these situations to think of the other person's feelings; after all, the regret and embarrassment may be mutual. The best course of action to take in this situation may be to pretend it never happened. This may not be the most mature course of action, but it does provide both of you with the opportunity to save face.

Running into the friend from high school you are no longer friends with:

It is inevitable that on one of your trips home you will cross paths with someone you have purposely not spoken to since high school. This is always awkward because your former friend will in all likelihood feel bound to remind you that you have not spoken in however many years it has been since you both graduated, usually as a way to try to make you feel guilty about the fact that you quietly phased him or her out of your life. Do not give in and make apologies for this; these things happen, people lose touch, and maybe if this person had not criticized your taste in guys, you two would still be friends. (Unless of course you did something bad, in which case you should take this opportunity to make amends; it will make you feel better about yourself.)

Also resist the urge to make empty promises about hanging out just to be polite. You know you have no intention of following through with this and most likely this person has no intention of accepting your invitation even if you did. If this person does not realize this, then you are giving him or her false hope of renewing your friendship, which is just being mean.

You get stuck footing the bill for the last party:

In the first act of Hamlet, Polonius advises his son, "Neither a borrower nor a lender be." Many people quote this when discussing money matters, but in reality, this mantra is easier repeated than followed. It is usually more uncomfortable to be in the position of the lender because no one wants to earn a reputation for being uptight about money.

Either bite the proverbial bullet and talk to your roommates about reimbursing you or just accept the fact that you are never going to see that money again. If you choose the latter, make sure you are really OK with this, because passive aggressiveness is only a short-term solution. You can also avoid becoming a doormat the next time you are all buying alcohol for a party by asking your roommates if they can foot the bill this time since you funded the last night of debauchery.