Column: He Said / She Said

So, housing sucks ... what else is new? I'll be a senior next year and living in Edmond's for the second year in a row. My roommates are contemplating finding an apartment off campus instead, but I don't know how I feel about moving off campus senior year. How do I tell them/convince them that I want to live with them, but I'd prefer to live on campus, Edmond's or not? -Housing Woes

Lisa Says: I don't blame you for not wanting to deal with leases (and subsequently subletters), cranky neighbors, Boston PD, scuzzy bathrooms, and Comm. Ave commutes. Show them this list of off-campus housing pleasures and ask if they're sure they want to.

Ask them what it is that they don't like about Edmond's. Too much on the outskirts of campus? Shockingly, off-campus apartments are further away from the rest of campus. Don't want to deal with the "dirty old" kitchens, bathrooms, and carpets? Point out that most affordable off-campus places have permanent layers of grossness on all of the floors. Tired of living in the same place for two years in a row? If that's their attitude, they will have quite a tiring and difficult journey through life.

Besides, it's senior year, and never again will you be able to walk out of your room at strange hours of the night and be just a moment's walk away from all of your friends. Next time the whining, er, discussion begins, suggest to your roommates that Edmond's next year could be fun. So close to the Mods! Make your case about staying there and see how they react. Add the requisite "I love living with you and can't imagine my life without you in the bedroom next door." Having four years of housing, even in Edmond's, is a great deal. Some people don't know how good they have it. Glad that you're not one of them.

Ryan Responds: I really can't imagine what you are going through. It must be tough for you, since you can't live exactly where you want to next year. I genuinely hope that you are going to make it.

Housing is something that a lot of students at Boston College criticize. To some degree it is justified, because there is almost this atmosphere that if you don't live in the Mods, your senior year is a failure. I can't think of any other university where housing causes as much concern or resentment.

Since Residential Life won't change until there are more residences built, you are going to have to adapt, because housing is not as big of a deal as it's made out to be. In fact, it's not a big deal at all. If you take two seconds and put things in perspective, you will see that there are so many other things that are more important.

When you talk to your roommates, simply remind them that the majority of seniors live on campus, so it will be much more convenient. Also, getting an apartment at this point will be much more of a hassle than it's probably worth. Lastly, you are a 21-year-old college student. You don't need to live in some elaborate apartment. All you need is a bed and a bathroom. Hopefully, after you lay out these reasons, your roommates won't be willing to go through the effort of renting an apartment. Have fun next year and try not to make a big deal over insignificant things.

Registering for classes is fast approaching. I'm not sure if it's a blessing or a curse, but my current direct roommate and I have the same major. She usually likes to take the same classes, which is normally fine, but it causes conflict when I do better than her; she is pretty competitive. I love her and taking classes with her is fun, but I'd rather plan my own schedule rather than discussing what "we" are going to take together. I'm feeling limited, like I can't take the classes I want to take because they don't fit in her schedule. How do I tell her that maybe we should go our separate schedule ways without hurting her feelings?

-Chaos Over Classes

Ryan Says: I can imagine that it must be tough for you to constantly do better than your roommate in all of your classes. I actually think it's impressive that your competitive roommate continually gets the academic beatdown from you, yet she keeps coming back for more. She is rather resilient.

On a side note, I figured right away that this was a problem between girls. Girls are usually extra sensitive to their friends' concerns. Guys can be sensitive too, but girls always seem to outdo us. For example, you are arranging your academic career to placate your roommate. I always think that it's helpful to have someone to study with in classes, but what you want to do is a little bit ridiculous.

You should find classes that you want to take. When your roommate asks what classes you are taking, just tell her that you haven't figured it out. After you finally decide what classes are best for you, then you can discuss it with your clingy roommate.

When she finds out that you have already picked your classes, she may be a little bummed. However, just explain to her that you have already decided on your classes and remind her that it's nothing personal. She is more than welcome to take any of those classes with you. You or someone else is paying a lot of money for you to go here, and you should be able to take whichever classes you want.

Lisa Responds You have the perfect excuse: Say you're going to take the classes you want, and feign surprise when she mentions the scheduling conflict. There is no reason, at all, to skip the classes you want for her sake (and it's also all right to take classes you like a little less mainly because they also don't work for her).

Taking classes you think you'll enjoy is not being mean or spiteful, so don't feel bad about "hurting her feelings."

If she takes it that way, she is overly sensitive and I wish you strength in this ordeal. You can reassure her by saying that you need to make the best schedule for you - your academic career and entire life depends on it (maybe a slight exaggeration, but go with it).