Ancient axe-wielders- News outlets in rural Russia are reporting that a local shepherd killed a vicious wolf who tried to attack the flock with an axe. The axe-wielder also happened to be a grandma. So next time you get the jitters walking through the graveyard or the O’Neill second floor bathroom, remember that a lil’ ol’ lady in Russia decapitated a vicious, ravenous beast like it ain’t no thang.
Thanksgiving- Ah, November, a time to give thanks that there is only a week left until boys shave their pedophile moustaches. It’s also a time to remember it’s still not kosher to use “buuuuuuut I’m in college” as an excuse when your parents demand to know why you came home at 3 a.m. and woke everyone up when you tried to order Dominos. But here’s to home, parents, high school friends, and bellies full of turkey.