Opinions, Column

Determine If BC’s Hookup Culture is For You

At Boston College, there is a general understanding about the hookup and relationship culture. BC is simply a hookup college. Hardly ever do we see BC couples walking around holding hands. And if we do, they are not together long enough to see the sun in May… it’s cuffing season y’all. These rare glimpses of commitment got me thinking about the idea of love in college. Is college a time to search for a “good time” or a “long time”?

That, ladies and gentlemen, is the only time I will ever quote Drake.

Through experiences and stories I’ve heard, I would say the only limit to your experience here at BC is you. In other words, do whatever you want. You have been on this earth for only 18 to 22 years. Do you even know who you are? What you like? As a senior, I would argue that by the time you are halfway through your 21st year of life, you have a pretty good idea of yourself. What I mean by this is you know whether or not hooking up is for you. Some people need emotion or dedication in order to have intimacy (off-campus, of course).

There are three questions that will tell you whether or not the hookup culture at BC (occasionally branching out to nearby schools) is something for you. Note, meeting and possibly venturing out with someone on the same night is not for everyone. Nor should it be. The following questions should be answered honestly. But if you choose to be dishonest, I would not blame you either.

Question 1: Are you the kind of person who does not want obligation or devotion to another human being?

If you answered “yes,”then the hookup culture at BC was made for you. There is no better place to enhance and strengthen your skills than in the opportunity-filled Mods, located in the middle of Lower Campus. It is important to remember your values and morals when entering this area. However, always remember what Hannah Montana said, “life’s what you make it, so let’s make it rock.”

If you answered “no,” and you find loyalty and respect at the core of your morality, then congratulations. You, my dear friend, are on your heavenly way to a life of pure happiness.

Do not feel pressure to stay in the yes or no state of mind. Morals and ethics change throughout your very long life (four years) here. Just do what feels right for you at the time.

Question 2: Do you find yourself using dating/hookup apps and actually following through with the meet up?

If your answer is a “no” and you prefer to get spiffed up and go out and see where the night takes you; then you probably are the King/Queen of the hookup scene by now. You own the night. Pick any club or bar to show off that new cut or fancy dress. Boston is a city of possibilities when you’re feeling confident. But please—handle yourself with class. There is nothing worse than a friend that needs to stay home.

If your answer is a “yes”—I personally want to thank you for your bravery and dedication to making the digital age ever growing. You would rather meet “the one” sober and during this time of our lives, that is a RARITY. Apps like these seem to be one of the only ways to let us do that nowadays—thanks millennials.

Question 3: When you hear the phrase “Netflix and Chill” does your brain light up more when you hear “Netflix” or “Chill”?

If you answered “Netflix,” I have deep respect for you. There’s nothing wrong with a little time with me, myself, and I on a Friday or Saturday night. Other times you just need to save that hard-earned cash for something more expensive than a shot of vodka. Side note: want to have a movie marathon?

If you answered “Chill”—I’m sure we all know who you are, and/or have been approached in a manner by someone like you, with a simple question mark at the end of the three-word phrase. Hookups are your forte. You’re living your best life during the best years of life. Get your partying and fun out of the way before you are stuck trying to justify your binge drinking as an adult.

These three questions should give you a pretty good idea of what kind of person you are on weekend nights. Now, these questions were not made to attack your character in any way. If you have a problem with your answers, I would advise you to consider those thoughts. At the end of the day your college degree won’t be determined on what happens out of the classroom (unless it’s illegal) and everyone has their own idea of fun. Do you and let others be themselves.  

Disclaimer: I am not selling you this way of life, I am simply trying to help my fellow students navigate this experimental time.

January 27, 2019