Despite some recent warmer weather, winter has not quite departed Chestnut Hill.
Even though the cold hasn’t been as prominent this year, the seasonal depression is undoubtedly present. Between the constant state of lethargy, the one nostril that always seems to be blocked with endless sniffles, and the unyielding responsibilities of my day-to-day life, life on the Heights has been relentless lately.
We’re a little over halfway through the spring semester, but the weeks have been moving at a snail’s pace. As lovely as it was to spend a week on the beach in Fort Lauderdale with my besties over Spring Break, the anxiety of returning to the same studying, working, and testing is distressing.
Yes, I understand this cycle is the basic framework of the college experience, but as soon as the clock strikes noon on Sunday, I instantly start longing for the next weekend to arrive.
Like a package deal, accompanying this seasonal depression and anxiety is burnout. A lack of concern for my grades and a feeling of indifference toward completing anything with timeliness has overtaken my headspace.
I recently neglected to study for my math midterm until the day of, partially because I kept pushing off studying until “the next day” (a dangerous game to play) and partially because I often gaslight myself into thinking I know everything when, in reality, I do not.
What score did I receive on this midterm? A 58. Did it phase me? Not really. I told myself I would make it up by doing exceptionally well on the next midterm, so perhaps I will provide an update in a future column.
Even beyond academia, social burnout has been rampantly affecting my life for weeks now. Sure, I love going out with my friends on the weekends, and partaking in the social scene of Boston College gives me a well-deserved break after five days of nonstop grinding. But inevitably, this leads me to forget about myself, and my exhaustion and well-being are thrown on the back burner for that gnarly rager on Foster Street.
Burnout, anxiety, and (seasonal) depression—B.A.D., if you will—come naturally with the true college experience. Whether baked into the fundamental structure of college, the collegiate experience in the 21st century, or some other immutable variable, B.A.D. is undoubtedly omnipresent.
An idea I often express to my friends is how college life is so “go go go” that there never seems to be a time to “stop stop stop.” I wish there were a time when the entire student body could be on campus without classes or responsibilities demanding our every waking minute. Just a little bit of time to enjoy what we’re often told will be “the best four years” of our lives.
College has been an unbelievable ride that I feel fortunate to experience. Still, sometimes I think everyone needs to take a minute, step back from BC, and ask themselves how they are really doing. Failing to acknowledge our states of being inevitably welcomes the B.A.D. trifecta.
Feeling these sentiments is very normal and totally warranted, but don’t let yourself give in to their dread. At the very least, get excited for the handful of upcoming days off from school that will allow you to unapologetically put college on hold and take time for yourself!
